Maybe it’s been awhile since someone said this to you, so simply receive it.
As a ministry professional (pastor or otherwise), thanks for all you do!
Most people have no idea what it takes to serve a congregation or operate as a denominational staff person. The more I think about it, maybe it’s a good thing they don’t know how the sausage is made!
But I do know. I know what you’re going through—the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows, those moments of intense joy offset by the hours of tedious and mind numbing administrative tasks that no one told you about when you went to seminary. I’ve been there many times myself.
There were many evenings, after a particularly difficult day, when I was ready to throw in the towel. It was taking a huge toll on my physical, emotional, and spiritual health—not to mention my relationship with my wife, kids, and parishioners. The more I struggled to keep up, the more reactive and less responsive I became. It was not a happy time for any of us.
As a ministry professional (pastor or otherwise), thanks for all you do!
Most people have no idea what it takes to serve a congregation or operate as a denominational staff person. The more I think about it, maybe it’s a good thing they don’t know how the sausage is made!
But I do know. I know what you’re going through—the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows, those moments of intense joy offset by the hours of tedious and mind numbing administrative tasks that no one told you about when you went to seminary. I’ve been there many times myself.
There were many evenings, after a particularly difficult day, when I was ready to throw in the towel. It was taking a huge toll on my physical, emotional, and spiritual health—not to mention my relationship with my wife, kids, and parishioners. The more I struggled to keep up, the more reactive and less responsive I became. It was not a happy time for any of us.
And then something happened…
the aging and declining congregation which I had been working to revitalize for nearly a decade voted to close its doors.
Suddenly, I was without a regular/formal call to ministry, had no income (my wife was a stay at home mom who at that time had already undergone two brain tumor surgeries), three kids closing in on college, and two elderly parents in a nursing home across the street from my old church office. I was hurt. I was tired. I was angry. I was frustrated. I was scared. I had nothing but time on my hands and little bit of severance pay from the church. I couldn’t see a way forward.
But then something else happened…
I don’t have time to give you the whole story, but four years later I am in the best physical shape since my Army days back in the early 1990’s. My 25 year marriage is at an all-time high water mark in regard to intimacy, commitment, and communication. Not only have my kids made it through college (for the most part, a few classes remaining), but my wife has also gone back to school and is completing her M.Ed this summer. My emotional wounds are healed, my spirituality is back on track, and I’m enjoying a measure of financial security that we never knew possible.
the aging and declining congregation which I had been working to revitalize for nearly a decade voted to close its doors.
Suddenly, I was without a regular/formal call to ministry, had no income (my wife was a stay at home mom who at that time had already undergone two brain tumor surgeries), three kids closing in on college, and two elderly parents in a nursing home across the street from my old church office. I was hurt. I was tired. I was angry. I was frustrated. I was scared. I had nothing but time on my hands and little bit of severance pay from the church. I couldn’t see a way forward.
But then something else happened…
I don’t have time to give you the whole story, but four years later I am in the best physical shape since my Army days back in the early 1990’s. My 25 year marriage is at an all-time high water mark in regard to intimacy, commitment, and communication. Not only have my kids made it through college (for the most part, a few classes remaining), but my wife has also gone back to school and is completing her M.Ed this summer. My emotional wounds are healed, my spirituality is back on track, and I’m enjoying a measure of financial security that we never knew possible.
One of the keys to my re-generation is coaching. I wish I’d known about coaching when I was in the eye of the hurricane of pastoral ministry. I might have avoided a lot of pain and been more successful by a power of ten! The writer of Proverbs points out that, “The purposes in the human mind are like deep water, but the intelligent will draw them out” (20:5).
That’s what coaching does—it brings out the depths of your purpose—things like:
Discovering untapped potential. You have strengths that you have discounted or neglected and not put to use. This is preventing you from serving God from the fullness of your being. Even if you think you’re bringing your “A-game” to your ministry, on a daily basis you’re leaving vast amounts of potential untapped. Working with a coach can dramatically expand your personal resourcefulness.
Clarity and focus. When you and/or your congregation loses focus on vision/mission/purpose, it’s easy to end up involved in nasty and divisive denominational politics. Whatever the current hot issue is, it begins to consume your time and energy. Because you’ve lost focus on what it is that you’re called to do and be, politics begins to take the center stage. Coaching can help redirect that focus back to where it needs to be.
Confidence. Sure, you have some great ideas, but as soon as them come there’s a voice inside your head that says, “What will people think? What will they say? What will they do?” Looking around, it seems that not changing is a lot safer in many ways. After all, things are going pretty well, why rock the boat? The truth is that without fears binding your freedom to respond to what the Lord is calling you to do, you’ll begin to see more possibilities, be more energized, and create new ways of doing ministry that will be transformational for yourself and your congregation.
Learning. You may be the smartest person in the room, but if it’s been awhile since you have taken any risks, charted any new course, challenged the status quo, or felt a sense of adventure in ministry then it’s time for some personalized coaching to help get you moving again. Time spent focusing your interests, strengths, and desires can help you discover how you be are being invited by God to move into the next season of your ministry.
Intentional progress. Nothing is more encouraging that success. Often times we come away from a conference with some idea that we’d like to try, but we never get around to implementing. With the help of a coach, you can close the “knowing versus doing” gap and with an intentional plan, move forward toward your goals. You’ll be able to find time you didn’t know you had, figure out how to become accountable to yourself, and do what you set out to do!
God-sized goals. As you become more focused, more energetic, and accomplish more than you have been accustomed to doing, you may find yourself being in a position to better hear what God is calling you become in order to be a better ministry leader at in an even larger sphere of ministry.
That’s what coaching does—it brings out the depths of your purpose—things like:
Discovering untapped potential. You have strengths that you have discounted or neglected and not put to use. This is preventing you from serving God from the fullness of your being. Even if you think you’re bringing your “A-game” to your ministry, on a daily basis you’re leaving vast amounts of potential untapped. Working with a coach can dramatically expand your personal resourcefulness.
Clarity and focus. When you and/or your congregation loses focus on vision/mission/purpose, it’s easy to end up involved in nasty and divisive denominational politics. Whatever the current hot issue is, it begins to consume your time and energy. Because you’ve lost focus on what it is that you’re called to do and be, politics begins to take the center stage. Coaching can help redirect that focus back to where it needs to be.
Confidence. Sure, you have some great ideas, but as soon as them come there’s a voice inside your head that says, “What will people think? What will they say? What will they do?” Looking around, it seems that not changing is a lot safer in many ways. After all, things are going pretty well, why rock the boat? The truth is that without fears binding your freedom to respond to what the Lord is calling you to do, you’ll begin to see more possibilities, be more energized, and create new ways of doing ministry that will be transformational for yourself and your congregation.
Learning. You may be the smartest person in the room, but if it’s been awhile since you have taken any risks, charted any new course, challenged the status quo, or felt a sense of adventure in ministry then it’s time for some personalized coaching to help get you moving again. Time spent focusing your interests, strengths, and desires can help you discover how you be are being invited by God to move into the next season of your ministry.
Intentional progress. Nothing is more encouraging that success. Often times we come away from a conference with some idea that we’d like to try, but we never get around to implementing. With the help of a coach, you can close the “knowing versus doing” gap and with an intentional plan, move forward toward your goals. You’ll be able to find time you didn’t know you had, figure out how to become accountable to yourself, and do what you set out to do!
God-sized goals. As you become more focused, more energetic, and accomplish more than you have been accustomed to doing, you may find yourself being in a position to better hear what God is calling you become in order to be a better ministry leader at in an even larger sphere of ministry.
How would it change your life, your ministry, and your congregation if you…
What would it mean for you to fully become the person that God created you to be?
I’ve helped my clergy coaching clients to better manage their internal state, reach down deep inside to identify solutions, and learn to deal more constructively with issues like these identified by Thom Rainer awhile back:
What could your ministry be like with the kind of support that comes from this type of coaching?
Just imagine…
…and if the scene you imagine so compelling, so inviting, so powerful that you want to begin moving in that direction, I can help you.
Conversely, if your current situation is highly toxic and you really identified with my “before story”—I can really help you get perspective and get moving into a more healthy place.
Either way, CLICK HERE to get on my calendar for a complementary consultation to explore how you might go about moving into that amazing new future.
Thanks for reading this all the way through.
If there’s any way I can help you, let me know!
- Found a venue where you would be listened to intently and loved unconditionally?
- Entered into a relationship with someone who was totally focused on your freedom to thrive?
- Were regularly challenged to think deeply? To know your strengths? To be clear and focused?
- Began to address fears instead of avoiding them?
- Committed to keep going and to continue learning? To move forward intentionally? To step up to the adventure of a God-sized calling?
What would it mean for you to fully become the person that God created you to be?
- You’d have to know your strengths. Some you may have known about for years, but others probably lie hidden.
- You’d have to realize that it’s a marathon, not a sprint, and developing those strengths will take time.
- You’d have to identify the actions you need to take that would get you there.
I’ve helped my clergy coaching clients to better manage their internal state, reach down deep inside to identify solutions, and learn to deal more constructively with issues like these identified by Thom Rainer awhile back:
- Apathy and Internal Focus. “I have been in ministry for over twenty years, and I’ve never seen church members more apathetic and internally focused.”
- Staffing. “I inherited staff from the previous pastor. It’s not a good match, but I don’t have the credibility to do anything about it.”
- Volunteer Recruiting and Retention. “It’s a full time job itself.”
- Time Management. “I end every week wondering why I got so little done.”
- Gaining Parishioner Buy-In. “I spend half my time developing a consensus from members about decisions from the mundane to the critical.”
- Builder/Boomer Mindset Challenges. “It seems like the older generation is determined to nix any new ideas or excitement from the younger generation.”
- Finances. “You can sum up our challenge in four simple words: We need more money.”
- Hiding Behind Traditions to Avoid Necessary Change. “I wish our members would put as much effort into reaching people for Christ as they do holding on to their traditions.”
- Personal Attacks and Criticism. “Some leaders in the church have appointed themselves to be my weekly critics.”
- Lay Leader Development. “We miss too many opportunities in ministry because we don’t have enough leaders ready.”
- Majoring on Minors. “We spent an hour in our last business conference discussing the fonts in our bulletins.”
- Loneliness and Isolation. “One of the toughest realities for me as pastor was the awareness that I have no true friends in the church.”
What could your ministry be like with the kind of support that comes from this type of coaching?
Just imagine…
…and if the scene you imagine so compelling, so inviting, so powerful that you want to begin moving in that direction, I can help you.
Conversely, if your current situation is highly toxic and you really identified with my “before story”—I can really help you get perspective and get moving into a more healthy place.
Either way, CLICK HERE to get on my calendar for a complementary consultation to explore how you might go about moving into that amazing new future.
Thanks for reading this all the way through.
If there’s any way I can help you, let me know!
